Wolf Gnards
Nerding Pop Culture
The Mystery of the 3 Seashells
Link: http://www.i-mockery.com/shorts/three-seashells/
Sylvester Stallone & I-Mockery Explain the Mystery of the 3 Seashell
There are many mysteries in the future, the most bizarre of which just might be: How will we wipe our asses? How will our children's children's children take care of business? A disintegration ray? Some sort of hover conversion system? Or perhaps the 3 seashells? The one thing everyone wanted to know from Demolition Man was just how the three seashells worked.
When I was kid I imagined their must have been some sort of light system like Simon. How the wipes you, I have no idea, but that's the best my mind could come up with. Fortunately, the writers of Demolition Man had far greater dreams.
In a 2006, interview with Ain't It Cool, Sly Stallone revealed what he was told by Demolition Man screenwriter Peter Lenkov:
OK, this may be bordering on the grotesque, but the way it was explained to me by the writer is you hold two seashells like chopsticks, pull gently and scrape what’s left with the third.
But for those of you that need a more visual representation of the wonders of toilet seashells, I-Mockery has presented a handy dandy diagram:
| Print article | This entry was posted by Wolfie G. Nards on 04/04/09 at 11:09:02 am . Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0. |
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Who is Wolf Gnards? Nerding pop culture since 2008. We answer the questions that no one cared enough to ask.
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04/07/09 @ 05:07:58 pm
WTF? Ok well....how does it work when you have the runs?
06/27/09 @ 12:21:29 pm
Personally, I thought it would be a lot more like getting cookie batter off of a spoon with another spoon. The other problem I have with this is I doubt they would actually be thrown away. I think they would be sterilized and reused!
02/28/10 @ 07:31:23 pm
I'm certain that in the future everyone will be equipped with surgically implanted micro black holes or teleportation devices in his or her colon, making wiping problems a thing of the past.
08/26/10 @ 04:18:51 pm
I wish I were lying when I say this is one of the main things that stuck with me from Demoliton Man.
I always thought you just scraped away. But what about women wiping the front.
*ouch* O_o Might rip a lip off.
09/15/10 @ 05:09:29 pm
good blog love this stuff
04/24/13 @ 12:33:28 pm
The Three Seashells is an old joke about a man waking up from a coma and the jest of it is, one is water, two is air and the third with a with a zip and a rip and a OOOW was the automatic tampon remover