Is Hermione Granger too Hot?

Emma Watson

This debate started when my co-worker popped his head over my cubicle and said, “Guess what? The Harry Potter chick's 19! Pound it!” And, of course, I bumped fists (no fist will ever go unbumped under my watch), but I felt very dirty afterwards. But here's the dilemma (beyond the obvious creepy perviness), Emma Watson got too good looking to play Hermione Granger, the cuteness of which threatens to unravel the world of Harry Potter. The problem is Emma has grown considerably better looking than her fellow cast members, and particularly her love interest Ron Weasley. To quote the great poet, Joe Jackson, “Is she really going out with him?”

This only became a problem because of a lack of foresight. One: when they made the original movie, no one knew that she would be Ron's love interest, or that romance would ever really became an element of the Potter universe. These were just little kids, so they cast little kids who fit the part. Fine. Problem two: No one suspected the both the fan base and J.K. Rowling would demand that these original kids finish the series. Producers probably thought they would replace the kids every few years. So, the films were stuck with the fact that Emma Watson was becoming a Hermione Granger that was clearly out of Ron Weasley's league.

Why this tears the universe apart is because in a real high school scenario, Hermione would pick the best looking guy in her social circle, that being Harry Potter. If she picked Harry, then Ron becomes a social outcast, drowning his sorrows in witch's brew and black magic. Eventually, becoming the pasty red headed Voldemort to Harry and Hermione's future child, Harrmio. And history repeats itself. Let's say for the sake of argument though that she, in fact, has a ginger fetish. She stays the course and stays with Ron. In the real life scenario, Potter spends every waking moment thinking about Hermione. Writing her love letters,hanging out around her locker. He can't eat, he can't sleep, he can't study magic. Sub par magical training means Harry will make some crucial mistake some place. Voldemort wins, rules the world, kills Ron Weasley, and takes Hermione as his child bride. And, of course, the much more likely scenario of all is she ditches both Ron and Harry for a college wizard.

The point is there is no way that Harry and Ron can stay friends if someone so good looking is between them. At some point, some one's feelings are going to get hurt and in the wizardry world angsty teens become old super villains.

Ron Weasley/Rocky Dennis

On second thought, what girl could ever say "No" to Ron Weasley?

  • The Mighty Ginge
    Comment from: The Mighty Ginge
    07/17/09 @ 04:33:01 am

    “Let’s say for the sake of argument though that she, in fact, has a ginger fetish.”

    Good lord I hope so. The girl threatens to dissolve the very fabric of space-time whenever she steps on screen, and makes me feel like a creepy old man in the process

  • Darius Whiteplume
    Comment from: Darius Whiteplume
    07/17/09 @ 08:49:40 am

    I feel a little disgusted that I knew she’d be hot from the first movie. What does that say about me :-\

  • Comment from: Wolf
    07/17/09 @ 01:11:30 pm

    I think you’re alright as long as you never created an age countdown.

  • Dee Dee Supreme
    Comment from: Dee Dee Supreme
    07/17/09 @ 08:58:23 pm

    Poor Rocky Dennis.

  • harish
    Comment from: harish
    01/23/10 @ 03:24:14 am

    hai its harish from india i am your big fan can make achat with me plese .my e.mail is

  • Cash
    Comment from: Cash
    07/16/10 @ 04:45:23 pm

    You’re a comedian, eh

  • nacha
    Comment from: nacha
    07/16/10 @ 11:18:04 pm

    man, ron weasly is hot! what’s wrong with you? hahah. rupert grint got veeery good loking as well. plus, he’s got a great sense of humor, us, girls, like that.

  • Richard Hall
    Comment from: Richard Hall
    10/29/10 @ 01:03:51 am

    Hermione Granger is HOT! The first time I saw her face in the first movie, I thought, “Damn!” I’ve secretly had a crush on her ever since. :) Do you think there’s a chance in the universe that she might go out with me? :) Probably not. Not to mention the fact that we live on opposite sides of the Atlantic Ocean. ): But, all I have to do is dream!

  • jay
    Comment from: jay
    02/04/11 @ 11:45:44 pm

    dude. rupert grint is way better looking than daniel radcliffe.

  • ashish
    Comment from: ashish
    01/28/12 @ 09:53:25 am

    i love hormine granger she is too sexy i wana hang out with her for a day at last i want to say is when i saw her in the first movie harry potter and the soceres stone i just wanted to have her autograph and lip mark but as she grew i just wana have sex with her every boy will like to have her

  • reiwon
    Comment from: reiwon
    07/18/12 @ 05:50:02 am

    she is too sexy i wana hang out with her for

  • Jo-Jo Rowling
    Comment from: Jo-Jo Rowling
    02/01/14 @ 12:51:06 pm

    My word, I say, you have done it to I! You haveth convinced me fullestly. I must release the press of this posthaste… cheerio.

  • Jennifer Karol Rowling
    Comment from: Jennifer Karol Rowling
    02/20/14 @ 02:03:42 pm

    OY! I’M J.K.! They an impositer, ME the REAL J.K.! Do not LISTEN with yurt ear holes! Blimey, he is one hellava ugly bugga though. Me wod not have casted him though, if they’d asked me, which they did not! When me writ Ron, me picture more a ginger Tom Selleck. Mmmmmm… Tom Selleck.