Besides a novel that has never come together, other projects I’ve been working on include an old timey radio play and a comic book. As of this moment, both are about as unfinished as the novel. These projects though interests me so much because they’re both things I can do myself. I can go to Kinkos and print out my own comic, and I can record my own radio play. Will anyone else care or ever see these things, well, that’s yet to be determined. I would imagine no.

My problem with the comic is that I can’t really draw. However, my bad drawings do have a certain style. While, not skillful or particularly chocked full of talent, they have a nice eccentric quality. A little bit like Sunday comics being forced into a graphic novel format. I have a few panels drawn but it’s going slower than I’d like.

Oh and there’s one last project. The thing I always joke about is a script for Chunky Butts. Chunky Butts is a fat camp movie, your average fat is fun kind of flick. So, for there’s a bunch of lovable fatties at Camp Chunka-Butta-Wanna (an old Indian name). And that’s about it. I’m sure there’s some sort of race or fart off. I imagine a fat mascot cat named Burritostein that does a lot of fat cat dancing. Of course, I’ve never written a single word of Chunky Butts. It has just become my automated answer.

“So, How’s the book going?” They ask.

I answer, “Oh, I’m working on a screen play now… Chunky Butts. It’s my life’s work.”

And then they say, “Oh.” And give me that look like how could I have squandered away so much promise. I shrug and smile… because that’s what I’m good at, wasting my gifts. Of course, at Camp Chunka-Butta-Wanna, we learn that it’s not about how other people feel about you, but how you feel about yourself.

And this fatty feels like dancing… heeeey.

Currently reading: Million Little Pieces