Wolf Gnards

How exactly does a movie like Air Buds in Space get made? The film industry is just a fascinating process to me. Like if full length feature films were exclusively made by creepy dudes in basements, I could totally see how Air Buds in Space can get made. I mean besides masturbating, what else does he have to do? If you can’t think of anything better to do than bating, I’m sure taking your time to write and direct an Air Buds movies sounds like a fantastic idea.

But that’s not how movies are made, movies are made in conference room, by grown men and women with college educations. Most likely wearing suits. With ties!? And Air Buds in Space is the best they can do! Someone not only had to have the wolf gnards—the shear audacity—to pitch Air Buds in Space, but someone else had to greenlight it as well. Someone had to hear that idea and say, “Why not? Why not throw these dogs into space.”

How do we get to the point where we’re shooting innocent sport loving puppies into space? The problem is Air Bud has mastered every sport there is: basketball, football, baseball, soccer, tennis, bowling, cricket, jai alai, midget tossing. So, at the big Hollywood meeting where the big boss man asks, “What will Bud master today?” and a lesser boss man meekly answers, “outer space,” it sounds like a fresh approach. Because “outer space” is neither a sport nor a logical answer to his question. Instead of just a regular bad idea, this sounds like an executive is thinking outside the box. The lesser boss man could have easily have said that Air Bud should be a lady judge on TV then, of course, they would have mad Air Bud in Court which could have been just as enjoyable.

Air Bud started with a simple dog that could hit an occasional basic on David Letterman, why are we sending this dog into space. Where are spending millions of tax payers dollars to see a dog sink a basket in outer space. What scenario would have to unravel for NASA to send Lassie or Patrick Ewing or a combination of Lassie and Patrick Ewing into space. Why must we go there, but more importantly if an Air Bud can go to space, surely Chunky Butts can also get a green light.

Your friendly neighborhood blogger,
J. Douglas Musashi

P.S. Dee Dee thought I photoshopped Spuds MacKenzie in the picture, sadly Spuds is for real and for some reason is joining those puppies on their wacky space voyage (ably voiced by Diedrich Bader). David Bowie also joins the Space Buddies on their magic journey.