Wolf Gnards

The sudden death of actor, Corey Haim, has a lot people keep asking me to do a Haim tribute, but I’ve already written about Corey Haim. And quite frankly I don’t have that much to say on the topic of Corey Haim. But I will say I am pro Haim.

In the Corey/Corey Conundrum I broke down that Corey Haim was the better of the two Coreys. Simply, look at the track record. The best Corey Haim/Corey Feldman films had Corey Haim as the main Corey and Corey Feldman as the backup Corey (Lost Boys, License to Drive). If you reversed the polarity the results were disastrous (Dream a Little Dream, National Lampoon’s Last Resort). Unfortunately, it was the same drug problems that may have lead to Haim’s death that also demoted him to Corey sidekick status. Still I will still always remember him as the superior Corey.

Of course, there has been some disagreement with the Gnards (as there often is) with someone stating that the Corey hierarchy goes:

Corey Hart > Corey Feldman > Corey Haim

I find this ridiculous because no one knows who Corey Hart is, go ahead Google him and come back later, I’ll wait. If you don’t want to Google him, I’ll tell you: Corey Hart is a Canadian songwriter who wrote Sunglasses at Night (now you’re probably like, “Oh yeah, I kinda remember that song… it sucked.”), and by all extents is considered a lesser Corey. How can Hart be the alpha Corey if he’s never even paired with another Corey? It takes a relationship with, at least, one other Corey to be considered in the Coreys, otherwise you’re just A Corey and certainly not THE Corey.

Maybe, in Canada it goes Corey Hart, Corey Haim, Corey Feldman, but for the rest of the Corey-appreciating world Haim was (and always will be) the Corey standard.